Exploding Heads and Christmas Themed School Assignments

Letter to Santa reading comprehension assignment.

I think my head might explode.

T attends public school. Public school.

Yet every year, the entire month of December is devoted to lessons with Christmas themes.

The anticipation of Christmas has him unhinged. Does it every year.

We deliberately avoid Elf on a Shelf and advent calendars and advent wreaths. We don't count down the days to Christmas -- although no doubt he's doing it in his head -- we try to keep on an even keel and not deviate from routine any more than possible.

I could have throttled the kindergarten teacher when T arrived home with a bell made out of green construction paper to which there was attached a strand of red and green construction paper loops. The instructions that came home with it told us to have him remove one loop each day until he removed the last loop -- that would be Christmas Eve! Woo hoo -- downward spiral child! And that is not a new yoga position.

This year I warned the teacher that T does not handle December well. His clip gets moved from green to yellow more times in December than any other month. I told her that if the lessons focus on the holiday and if there are any countdown to Christmas assignments, he'll lose his ability to self-regulate. She shook her head and assured me that she doesn't do Christmas in the classroom.

"Whew," I thought. "As it should be in a public school." Sunday school and church are where a child should learn about Christmas. Or parochial schools. But what does the Muslim child in T's class do when the math assignment is about adding up how many Christmas trees are for sale or the reading comprehension exercise is based on a girl's letter to Santa Claus? I guess I'm going too find out.

Because after a horrible four days, and an epic meltdown yesterday afternoon, I wrote a note to the teacher. T is not allowed to be given any assignments that are in any way related to Christmas, including, but not limited to Christmas trees, Santa Claus, jingle bells, elves, mistletoe, cookie plates, flying reindeer, or anything else that is culturally linked with Christmas.

I don't expect this to be the magic answer to our struggles, but I think it will help. Because with anticipation comes anxiety, and anxiety means I might be in a fight for survival and a fight for survival means I better go to that lower, non-rational, non-thinking part of my brain. Which means Christmas hell for us.

I know teachers complain about  how wound up kids get in the days/weeks leading up to Christmas. With all due respect to my teacher friends, then why the heck do they feed into it? If you don't want kids gone crazy, don't contribute to it.

It seems simple to me. If you're not teaching Sunday school or at Our Lady of Whatever Saint school, then keep Christmas out of the curriculum.

I'm not a Christmas humbug. Put me in a church on Christmas Eve and I don't need to open the hymnal to sing any of the songs. I love gift giving and Christmas cards and how pretty the tree looks, and the way Christmas lights bring some cheer to the long nights of winter. I love Christmas Eve service and hearing the familiar passages from Luke, and watching The Grinch Who Stole Christmas and It's a Charlie Brown Christmas, both with their strong messages of what Christmas is and is not. It is not the shiniest Christmas tree and it cannot be bought in a store.

And it does not belong in public school. If they all can't figure that out, then my head just might explode.